Saturday, September 23, 2006

Attitude Matters!!! (pun intended)

Helllllo ppl!!! Hope all is well!!! i am doin great... and no wat... i just came bk from lab and eurekhaaaaaaaa... v got a positive result at last... after 2 months of slogging!!! Now, i can look forward to doing the next step!!!! Hehe :)

Oki.. now here is last week's updates.. my musings begin....... :)As I walked into the lecture theatre on friday afternoon, I could feel about hundred pairs of eyes giving me that oh-my-god-kinda look, making me feel uncomfy. The stares sure were not 'coz of my new hairdo, or my super cool pink top, but 'coz of the bandage that i wore on my right wrist!!! Yeah, i managed a perfect wrist sprain 2 days ago!!! Dunt ask me how, when, where or what. I have no answer. A hyper-active girl, simply doesnt know where she picks up such minor damages!!! :P So, after i felt that the pain was doin me no good, i went to my university hospital and the doc was soo damn sweet that he said - "Hey, u managed to sprain ur hand at the right time. Have the whole mid-semester break to take care of it!!" Hehe :) Wish i had such sprains when i was in school!! I could have got an excuse from doin homework and most interestingly, mom would have fed me in such a circumstance!! :P And Yessssssssss people, the whole of next week, no lectures, no assignments... but lots of pending stuff to work on, preparations for mid-sem test and of course, some freak outs as well!!! I was planning to experiment some new recipe, eat well, freak out, prepare notes - basically, was plannin to do lots of physical activity. Now, i got to wait until my wrist feels fine. And yeah, it is gettin better!!! :)

Prithz hand - firmly strapped and curbed of its usual freedom!!! :'(

Oki, gettin to the topic, last afternoon, during the 10 min break in-between lecture, my frnd and me were giggling like clowns over a punch dialog that i managed to tell her and suddenly, one of my batchmates came up to me and asked, "Hey, do you know that there is this new 24-hour suicide hotline number for students???" I gave him a super-cocktail look - blank, blunt, puzzled, shocked, surprised!!! I replied, "Sorry... was that question for me???" Then, he pointed out to my hand and conjured a question mark in thin air. I gave out a furious laugh. How could anyone ask such a dumb question to me??? Do i look like i wanna commit suicide??? Wretched?? Forlorn??? Of course not!!! I am in the best of my spirits, enjoying every moment of this phase of ma life. I never imagined that a simple sprain could get people thinking this way. As a matter of fact, if that guy had questioned me with some sort of a sarcastic smile, i would have forgiven him. (haha, did u notice the alliteration that i managed??? lol!!!) But to my utter dismay, he came up and questioned me as if he were asking me some academic doubt!!! Even after my straight reply, his face was still sans a smile. (haha, another alliteration!!!) If his question was meant to be a joke, let him know that i couldnt even manage to get a tiny-weeny smile twinched outta the corner of my lips.

Another strange incident happened this week. My frnd and i were walkin out of the tutorial class. I was to rush for my lecture, while my frnd agreed to get things ready in the lab, so that i could join her after my lecture. She asked me, "We are isolating DNA today, right??" I hastily replied, "No di, not today. May be not at all." Then, she turned furious, turned her back to me, and rushed right ahead of me. I could faintly hear her murmur, "Hey, if u are not interested, then, i am going to do it alone." I got thoroughly aggitated. Inspite of my temper, i tried to calmly explain to her as to why we mite not need to do DNA isolation that day. Then, she finally managed to give a rather rough "ok" that spoke nothing, but of her ego.

This mite seem so trivial an issue, but frankly, in my opinion, her reaction was nasty. Utterly disgusting! I hate people who, while on a discussion, simply walk away (thinking they are being too smart, making a fool out of the other) or abrupty cut a conversation. According to me, it speaks of one's intolerance, indifference, ego, dangerous short-temper or simply of one's acceptance of defeat. If i were in such a situation, i would simply accept my mistake and go on. Please dunt get to thinking that i am trying to picture myself as a very goody-goody girl. Until a year ago, I was myself a very egoistic and short tempered person. I literally got thumped. I was one of those fools who repeatedly learnt from their own mistakes. A timid girl i was, fuming with inferiority complex. Now, i have learnt to silently tell others that 'Your inferiority complex is much better than mine.' An independent life, away from home and family have by itself been wonderful teachers. I have evolved into what i am today, keeping alive my zeal and zest.

I am seriously confused as to why i begin to think this way. Its probably my age, or MY attitude that is pretty much antogonistic to my frnd's. At times, we just dont realise the stupidity of our actions and reactions. It can badly mirror our character. Anways, at the end of the day, i feel that all these thoughts cross my mind 'coz I am smiling a bit too much these days, so much so that i always feel that the other person is either smiling too little or has totally forgotten how to smile. Could also be that i am beginning to take things easy, which my associates are still tryin to learn. All these were just some random thoughts that flashed my mind and i managed to ramble about them here. This frnd and me are in good terms. It is jus her attitude that botheres me. I will tell her what i feel about it when the time is ripe. Hope i didnt confuse u guys as much as i got confused myself. LOL!!! Take care.. and have a good day... hugggggggggggzzzzzzzzzzz!!! :)

Sunday, September 17, 2006

The Desi Touch...

Yaloooooooo peoples!!! Hope u guys are having a wonderful weekend. But, bet ya, it cannot match the kinda fun i have had this weekend. Well, as usual, this post is goin to be pretty much reflective of my current ecstatic, highly-hyperactive state. No serious discussions this time. Haha!!! Happy??? I cant wait to tell u guys what has been happenin in life for the past few days.. its been an awesome roller coaster of a ride for me!!! Believe me.. i thoroughly enjoyed it and i wish that the rest of my sem could pass this way.. :P

Oki, here i goooooooooooooooooo........ (*nowadays, my blog is turning into a "dear diary" kinda thing*) LOL!!! Plz bear with me...

Thursday -

The alarm little aroused my senses and i woke up with a start realising that i had missed my 9am tutorial!!!
S*** thing!! Its a graded tutorial and i better not miss it. Previous night's struggle with assignment until 3am was beginning to teach me the first lesson of the day - "The dawn doesnt come twice to awaken the man." Later, I rang up my frnd to ask her when the next tutorial slot was and she was like - "Its oki di. Forget it, only one class na. At least u slept comfortably in your room, unlike me!!" I had a good laf and as if that were not enough, i mailed to my tutor informing her of my "sickness" and inability to attend class! Like a goody-goody girl, i pleaded for an excuse and arranged a make-up class with her!!! Rest of the day went in peace, preparing for my online quiz and tryin out a new cabbage-tomato curry. It came out really well. For the recipe, my current MRP is one BIG butterscotch icecream and a pack of ferero rocher chocolates. Simple! :P

Friday -

Haha!!! One super cool day. Brought me memories of indian life. The day started off after i snoozed the alarm almost a dozen times and finally forced myself outta bed. I began my online assignment, prepared lunch, ate and was already late for the 1pm make-up tutorial i had arranged!!! To add on to all the hullabaloo, it was raining cats and dogs. Thundering!!! I ran and screeched to a halt at the bus stop only to find the bus jus cross me. Damn it!!! I had to wait for 5 more mins for the next one. Now, 5 mins is a big thing, considering the fact that the tutorial itself lasts only an hour and it would take me another 5 mins to reach my tutorial room, even if i sprintered. Time:1.15pm. OMG!!! I was gettin too late now. So much do these people stick to their doctrines, that the bus would not leave a few mins before the scheduled time. I was so restless that i was giving the bus captain a desparate look to start the bus, but as if he were unawares of the entire world, he continued to shower the bus and scrub it with detergent or watever u call it!!! Ahhhhhhhh!!!! Now this was gettin out of my hands. I was contemplating if i should go to class so late or just chuck it.

Finally, the bus roared to life. I got in. Slow melody was playing in my ipod and little did it relax my nerves. 1.30pm - My stop arrived. I got down and soared to the lift, jus got it when it was begining to ascend. 1.33pm. Palpitating. I knocked the door and walked in. Ahhh!!! That was a record breaker. 3 mins from bus stop to tutorial room - beat me at that!! 'If only i were allowed to run in the Olympics', i thought :P Ok, now, all seats were occupied in the tutorial room. I joined another girl who was sittin on one of the tables. Tom-boyish as it seemed, i sat on the desk :P No chairs lah!! The girl passed me the attendence record!!! That's wat i was here for, wasnt i??!!Signed my name. Relaxed i was now. Hehe :) Then the tutor went on -

"In tis propulum, we shudu write down hyptiz leiku tiz - conziter grupu one ancht grupu two. Howeva, we doncht no de ikzact valu of meenz...."

I menacingly smiled at my friends who were surprised to see me (of all the people) walk in so late to class. I looked around the room to find some of them mechanically taking down notes, some checking mails in the computer (techically installed with some software that we needed to work out problems!!) and the others, chatting with their friends in msn!!! 1.45pm. I heard the tutor say - "Oki, taz it. U can go!!" Hehe :) Done!!! Rest of the day went in style. What else would you expect if i had stats lecture??? (*Prof was in casual t-shirt, jeans and sports shoes - Friday it was!!!*) :P That night, after nearly one and a half months, i had pizza!!! LOL!!!

Saturday -

Attended life sciences career day, went to a local school for mentoring students as part of my co-curricular activity. Mid-day, was in a temple with almost my entire batch of indian frnds for temple washing seva. Not to differ, I was as excited about the whole thing. Pulled up pants, seasoned my voice, began singing "Swargam yeanbathu nammaku" and cleaned the temple and washed it clean. Ah.... i felt so nice, or should i say Divine!!! LOL!!! Then, they served us super cool lunch, but jus when i touched the hot food, i realised a searing pain in my finger!!! Gosh!!! Not again, i had a cut in my right thumb. Jus now i recovered from a minor sprain that i had developed in my elbow, while
the bus captain suddenly took the bus, before i cud get seated. Ahhh!!! :( The food was so inviting, my thumb was spoiling the whole fun!!

Later that day, the best part of my weekend was to arrive. I went to the parlour with my frnd and got a layer cut for my hair!!! Now, i look so much like myself - freaky, excited and hyperactive!!! Perfectly suits my attitude. Hehe :)

Sunday -

Ah!!! Another awesome day. One of our family frnds had invited me to a function at their place. My aunt and me planned to go there exclusively for the awesome food!!! :P Though the fried rice, panner sabji, manchurian were all very inviting, i could not resist on attacking curd rice, pickle and papad!!! :P Ate my tummy full. The cool weather,, mild drizzle and the food got me into a deep 3 hour "nap"!!!

So, was that enough???!!! Hehe :) Wishing you guys an awesome week ahead.. take care... Huuuuuuugzzzzzzzzz!!! :)

p.s.: Guys, i have updated to blogger - beta version. I am unable to comment in few of your blogs which do not accept anony comments. :( However, in my blog, i guess non-beta users can select anony option and leave ur name while u comment. Thanks.

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Swarmed by questions...

Helllooooooooooo ppl!!! How u guys doin???? I am doing great. As planned, i completed all my assignments, only to realise that i have the next set of online tests and an assignment lined up for this week!!!PHEW!!! I cant wait for my mid-semester break thats coming up this month end. And yeah, can u guys believe that i am almost into completing half my semester??!! I remember how you guys were consoling me with the fact that time would fly once school begins. For sure, time is flying, out of control!!. And guys, no wat???? My teddy arrived from India this week!!! I am sooooooooo excited about it. It feels like some friend has come over to stay with me and give me good company. Thanks to my uncle who brought it for me. And yeah, my mom sent other eatables like, potato chips from Hot Chips, choc chip biscuits, cashew macroons and haldirams snacks!!! Hehe :)

And hey, here is my teddy!!! He was damn tired after the long travel from Chennai to S'pore. So, he looks really weary na!!! Hehe :)

Ok, jokes apart. Lets get down to the topic, a serious one this time. This weekend, while i was talkin to my mom, i told her that i was planning to get a haircut done. Not a very short one though. But, something which can break the monotony of my looks. As soon as the words left my mouth, immediately she protested. She sounded as if, when i get back to India with this new hair style, people might get into false impressions and pass uneasy comments. She feels that i need to maintain the identity that i have always had within my family and in my neighbourhood (be it my looks or my attitude). Who knows, if i had not come to S'pore, i might still have wanted a change. It is all a matter of exploring and getting to "feel good" about oneself. My personal opinion is that the so-called "foreign return" identity of mine has nothing to do with my change of looks (if it does), as long as i remain the same by character and attitude, which am sure i will.

This aroused other wierd questions in my mind. Why is it that certain trivial decisions that i need to take in my life need consultation??? Why cant i simply go ahead with certain thoughts??? Havn't i grown up enough to become a young adult??? Have i not had enough "hard" lessons in life that give me the experience, courage and right to take decisions my way??? If my happiness is what gives them joy, then am i not allowed to take decisions that i feel will make me happy??? Should i be worried about all the gossip that people might come up with??? Or should i bother about my dreams, wishes and desires?? Is this not my only opportunity to exploit the resources of life and learn from my successes and failures??? Or is it 'coz this is my only opprotunity that i need to take on life without risks??? Ultimately, is it not my life's decisions that i wish to take???

Now, now, dont get me wrong. Its not that i dont have the interests of my parents in mind or that i am too self-centred about my desires in life. Its my age and my immaturity that makes me come up with such questions. To tell u the truth, my mom was dead-against letting me come off to S'pore. It was a hard decision I made. Still, personally i know how much of self-councelling she had to bend herself to, so that she could one day see her daughter happily settled with her dreams fulfilled. In a way, we both have sacrificed a lot. Not to leave behind my dad. He has been one huge source of inspiration and support to both of us. God only knows how much grief and pain he kept burrowed while he was consoling my mom and trying to guide me too. Moreover, though i am the only girl in our nuclear, as well as our master family, i am happy that i was not a pampered kid. Else, i might have taken many things for granted and not have been instilled with certain basic ethics of life.

Going back to my random thoughts. Its probably every mother's nature to look upon her son/daughter as a kid, no matter how old they are. It is also parental nature to be protective over their chilren and make sure that every decision taken by their kid be right, especially if the kid is far away from home. That's probably why my parents insist that i stick to their suggestions. Considering the fact that i am still dependent on them, it is true that my parents have the right over certain paths that i am goin to take in my life. Being all by myself, i have the complete freedom to do what i want, but it is upto me to limit myself with the space i have. I need to have self-control and i need to keep my people in trust. I need to maintain my individuality. Now that i have seen more of this world, my attitude towards life has surely changed (for the good that is). A closed nerdy brain that was once before, now feels the need for some adventure, few mis-givings, small lies and excitement. Its in this stage that i can explore the world to the wierdest of imaginations and also learn my valuable lessons in life. For heaven's sake, i cant be experimenting with my hairstlye when i am 50 years old or go out on late night outings!!! :P

So, i have loads to think about and take certain decision of life, ensuring that i hurt none and also make myself happy. That, i believe is the greatest challenge of life. In no way do i mean to hurt my mom or my dad's feelings in this regard.
Its just an honest flow of thoughts that i have scribbled. I still wish to be identified as their daughter. I shall sincerely respect their decisions for, i have also experienced how bad things can get if i dunt. So, no hair cut until i get a green signal from mom!! :) Oki, i guess i shall conclude it here. These thoughts have been haunting my mind since this weekend. Now that i have given them a vent, i can rest in peace and go on with my lessons. So, people... take care... have an awesome week. I hope to be back with something refreshing next time.. Till then... Chiao!!! Hugggzzzz!!!

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Racing at 24hrs/day!!!

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii people!!! Hope you guys are having a good week. Am really sorry that i couldnt update my space any sooner. Frankly, my mind and brain have been frantically working that they dont seem to enter the trance required to coin a post!!! I just barged in to wave out to u guys a BIG hi! I didnt wanna come here with a post that says "I will be away!" I feel it would not do justice to my space which i have created to pour out my feelings. Anyways, i have revived from that trauma of my lost watch, and now am back to my high spirits (The very next day after i had lost my watch, I had 2 big scoops of raspberry icecream and some other nutty nutty icecream. All my sorrow, melted as rapidly as did the icecream in my mouth. So now, moa is back to form!! LOL!!!)

Frankly, i have 2 assisgnments, a 700 word essay, 1 online quiz to complete by the next 2 days. All this is apart from my 5-hour lab sessions, 4 hour lectures, other co-curricular activities, cooking, laundry and sleep that i need to catch up with everyday!!!! So please bear with me for not coming up with a decent post. But the best part is that, i just got new speakers for my room!!! My obsession with music and your motivation to improve my singing talent, forced me to get them. So, i managed to save some money the previous month and grabbed this one!!! Now, i have some good company to sit with while i go on to complete my assignments!!! With no topic to blog about, i thought i would leave u guys with some pics of my room.

In the hope that i would have completed most of my pending studies and grabbed all my lost sleep, some good food and of course, recharge myself, i bid adieu!!! Chiao!!!! Take care and huggggggggzzzzzzzz!!! :)